waswas part 2

One thing that gets me is this doubt. Doubting myself, its out of striving for perfection in the Deen. But no one's perfect, we do what we can. But with Islam as a guide,it has countless guidelines and many times this overwhelms muslims who are trying to follow every single part, including me. So this goes out to us all.

the balancing act: FEAR and HOPE

HOPING TOO MUCH:

Allah says: "None feels secure from the Plan of Allah except the people who are the losers.'' (7:99)

FEARING TOO MUCH:

He also says: "Certainly no one despairs of Allah's Mercy, except the people who disbelieve.'' (12:87)

This means there's no black and white, only Allah knows each and every person, their trials and what they have to overcome them. He knows when we are deliberately heedless and when the fear is low.

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "If a believer had full knowledge of the chastisement of Allah, none would covet His Jannah; and were an infidel to know the Mercy Allah has, none would despair of His Jannah".[Muslim].

"Verily, your Rabb is Quick in Retribution (for the disobedient, wicked) and certainly He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful (for the obedient and those who beg Allah's forgiveness).'' (7:167)

There is a battle within me

to retain some sanity

to stay composed

to stay human

The ideal feels too constrained

the present feels too long

the sun shines down

the wind, still whispering

I have walked so far

hoping for purity of heart

Yet it took one prick to stain the ocean red,

What poison dyes so strong?

Pleasure, Restraint

Fun, Piety

one or the other

this world or the next

Is there an in between?

SUBHANALLAH

Am I burning myself with this

digging the well too deep

drowning as the water

gushes forward

I am a confused girl

but my soul has already made up her mind

there's got to be a balance

the straight lane is too hard

I am but flesh

the bent lane is too easy

too heedless would that path be

I do have a questioning conscience

so the way is that is stubby green

rocky upward trek never taken

It's a brand new day

a learning experience

learning myself

learning a new kind of restraint

an easing, accepting, true to myself

restraint

I saw through materialism

but found the value of beauty

I saw the fradulent foundations of our civilisation

but came back to loving the mankind struggling each day

I saw a glimpse of the darkest future

but reassure myself with Dhikr and prayer

that has to bring me some light

I recognised white and black

but saw grey in the mirror

I found two extremes but came to myself

the middle ground

Ibn Mas`ud (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "Jannah is nearer to you than your shoelace, and so is the (Hell) Fire".[Al-Bukhari].